How to read a book about dinosaurs to your toddler...

My two year old daughter is currently obsessed with dinosaurs, despite my constant affirmation that neither geology nor paleontology are real sciences. But who am I to deny her what her heart apparently so desperately desires?

So I got her some dinosaur books.  I think I need to backtrack for a minute though...

I'm obsessed with xkcd.com (a webcomic of romance, sarcasm, math and language to use their own words).  I spend hours reading and giggling at it, and as such I also really enjoy the whole velociraptor injokes - probably because I do similar.  Here's just one example of an xkcd comic relating to velociraptors:

As you've probably gathered from some of my other posts, I also tend to have a flair for the melodramatic.  And if you've seen Jurassic Park you'll know that it's filled with shrieking dinosaur sounds.

Enter my daughter's dinosaur books.

Why read a dinosaur book if you're not going to do awesome sound effects along with it?  The first page in one of her books has a picture of a velociraptor.  The text is "Running.  Follow me little dino. I can run so fast!".

Unless you live in this house...

Then it becomes "VELOCIRAPTOR! *aaaccccckkkkk-eeeeee-sssshhrrrrrriiieeeekkk* OH MY SPOCK, IT'S JURASSIC PARK! *more sound effects* RUN!!! RUN AWAY!!! *more sound effects* Quick! Into the kitchen! OH NO!  THEY CAN OPEN DOORS! *more sound effects* *dramatic fall to the floor* HIDE!!!!! *commando roll under the coffee table and more sound effects*"

*ahem*

In my defense, she loves it.  I do sometimes wonder if I should tone it down a bit, and whether I'm paving the way to be financing her future therapists trips to exotic Asian locations every other week.